Smut Boys - Niall

My relationship with my body has and will still be a journey. When I was younger I was a little bag of bones, but as I grew up I began to feel the pressure to have the perfect body. There was an expectation for guys to have muscular arms, six pack abs and a smooth body.

That pressure became much more apparent when I came out. It seemed that only gay men with muscular and hairless bodies were the only ones worthy of attention. I felt like I could never meet that expectation, as hard as I tried. It didn't matter how much I exercised, or what diet I tried or how many times I shaved. I always felt like I was never going to be good enough.

Social media does still present that narrative for gay men to have a certain type of body, but I have found the parts of it that encourage guys to embrace their natural bodies. Within the last few years I started to feel better in my own skin, embracing my body hair and not needing a flat stomach and massive biceps.

I have learned that as long as I feel comfortable in my own body, then those expectations do not matter at all. I realised there are plenty of other men out there just like me and that we are all sexy in our way.